Season 4 Step 1 Blog 2: Social Grace

Social Grace

A little over a year ago, I helped a blind man named Noah around the Kroger grocery store where I work. When we had finished shopping, he asked for my Facebook information, and we started hanging out shortly after that. I learned that he was a musician, and we started playing music together.

On the week of Christmas, I planned to go to Noah's house to practice a new song. Unfortunately, because everyone in my family (except me) got Covid that week, I couldn't see Noah until the 17th of January because he had to work out of town. Since the last time you, the audience, heard about Noah, a couple of things have changed. The first thing is Noah moved into a bigger apartment. It's a nice place, and there is a lot more room for us to goof around while we're practicing. The second thing is Noah started dating a girl named Lori.

I stopped hanging out with Noah for a little bit as he moved into his new apartment because too much was going on. The first time we hung out again, we had lunch, and Lori dropped him off at the restaurant. I don't count that as actually meeting her because the only thing we did was introduce ourselves. On the 17th, while we were practicing, I asked Noah when I was officially going to meet Lori. Later in the week, I got a voice memo from Noah explaining that Lori would be in town the next weekend, and we could go out to dinner on Saturday.

Lori and Noah picked me up because the Northstar restaurant we were going to was right up the street from my house, so they were already in the area. Around 6:00, Luke and Josh saw Noah and Lori on our doorbell camera, and they told me that they were here. Lori started driving us up the street, and then I realized I had forgotten my mask, so we had to go back to my house.

We finally arrived at Northstar, and after we placed our orders and sat down, I realized a sobering truth. Throughout my entire life, I have had trouble holding conversations with people I don't know, I attribute this to my autism. It hasn't been as much of a problem in my adult life because I'd built up social grace over my 22 and 1/2 years before Covid. Unfortunately, nearly a year into this thing, all of that social grace is gone! Now, this is not to say I was uncomfortable talking to Lori. On the contrary, she is the kind of person I would be friends with even if she weren't dating one of my established friends, and I can tell she's a perfect fit for Noah. It was a lot harder for me to talk to her than it should have been, and it blindsided me.

I'm just so glad that Noah was with me when I happened to come to this realization. Whenever the conversation would lag, Noah didn't let it get awkward. Instead, he would steer the conversation in a direction where he knew I could stand on my own, and the night went smoothly from then on.

Have a Greattastic day and be safe!

J. Mitchie Ulibarri

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 1: Cousin Simple Returns

 Cousin Simple Returns

As I've mentioned a few times, my brother Ryan is the lead guitarist in the band Cousin Simple. On February 29th, 2020, Ryan and his bandmates, Will (Frontman), Mitch (Pianist/Ukulele), and Joel (drummer) played their 100th show. Mom's college roommate was coming into town for the show. Shannon, and her husband, Tim, got to my house on Meadow Park Drive, at about 5:30.

Fifteen minutes later, my parents, Shannon and Tim, my other brothers Luke and Josh, and I drove to a pizza place in downtown Columbus. At the pizza place, we met up with Will's parents, Mitch's parents, a few people from Mom's side of the family, as well as Mom and Dad's college best friends, Ron and Anita Wallace. We ate dinner and talked until 8:00, an hour and a half before Cousin Simple was scheduled to play.

We walked into the A&R bar where Cousin Simple was playing and went to the very back and I put my coat behind the merch table. Mitch's sister, Tessa, and his cousin, Rachel, were running the merch table. I talked to them for a few minutes before my friend Marshall texted me and told me he was at the door because I had his ticket. I ran to the door, got Marshall in, and introduced him to the members of my family and friends that he had not met yet. After another hour, I got a text from a friend from grade school named Anna, who told me that she had arrived with her parents, and a friend.

Another friend joined our group, and we spent the next 30 minutes working our way through the crowd of fans to get as close to the stage as possible. At 9:29, I saw Luke and Josh on the stage where they put the last few things into position, and the band slowly walked on. Will's sister Helen turned on the lights, and the boys started playing.

Over the next hour, Cousin Simple played original songs such as "Song to Emma," "Strangers," "Honeybee," "Star Destroyers," and many others. The crowd danced to the music the whole time, mirroring the boys' energy on stage. A week later, on March 7th, Marshall, and I flew to Colorado to surprise my "sisters." immediately when we returned to Ohio, the governor shut down schools because of COVID-19. In other words, the last thing I did in my home state pre-covid (besides work) was go to that Cousin Simple show.

Cousin Simple did a few things over the quarantine. I orchestrated a zoom concert with Will and Sam's Fans in late April. The entire band did an Instagram live through WNCI, a local radio station, in support of the class of 2020. Lastly, the boys wrote new music and Joel left the band.

As I stated in the Christmas special, on the week of Christmas, everyone in my family except for myself, tested positive for Covid-19. I ended up in the attic, where I Isolated from my family.

At midnight on January 8th, 2021, Cousin Simple released their newest song, "We Know." As I listened to the song from the attic, I got excited! Suddenly the last big thing that happened for Cousin Simple didn't happen at the end of February; it was happening now, and I had to take that as a good sign! It's no secret that 2020 wasn't the best year, and I'm not expecting 2021 to bring its "A” game. The only thing I want from 2021 is to see some positive trends, and I genuinely believe that this is the start of one!

Have a Greattastic day and be safe!

J. Mitchie Ulibarri

You can listen to “We Know” and all of Cousin Simple’s other songs on Spotify or wherever you listen to your music. You can find them on social media as Cousin Simple on Facebook, Instagram, and @cousinsimple_ on Twitter!