Season 4 Step 1 Blog 15: Talk To Kathy

 Talk To Kathy

Back in October 2019, I got a job at the school that I went to directly after being diagnosed with autism, Haugland Learning Center (HLC). I worked in the after-school program (Ace) with six college girls named Sydney, Caitlin, Kelly, Sam, Olivia, and Miranda, under our two bosses, Addison and Jason. I learned how to work well with all of them and became friends with each of them. Shortly after I started the job, I overheard that if I have two years of experience with kids on the spectrum, I could become a teacher's aide anywhere in the state. I didn't do any deep research on that, so I was unsure how that would pan out, but that was my rough plan.

After I got the job, I wanted to start writing about it for Rules For a Greattastic Life, but I didn't want to talk about any kids. So the compromise that I made with myself was to write about the relationships with my coworkers when we got the chance to do something outside of school.

As you may know, I also have worked at a Kroger grocery store for about three years (at the time of this installment posting, not at the events of this story). My shift at HLC was from 2:30-6:00 a few times a week, including Thursdays. The problem was that I had a 6:00 shift at Kroger on Thursdays. As a result, on Thursdays, I would take Lyft up to HLC at 2:10-ish, Lyft back home at 4:30, Eat dinner, and have Mom drive me to Kroger. On the 6th of February 2020, I went to Addison and Jason's office to put my walkie-talkie away before leaving for my Kroger shift.

"You leaving Mitch?" Addison asked from her desk.

"Yeah…" I sighed.

"You good?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I replied, "it's just definitely time for me to move on from Kroger… like it's a good job, but I think I've gotten everything I can out of it."

"I get that!" She said, "You know if you ever want to you could always just go full time in Ace and quit Kroger."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I was excited about the offer because It would be one step closer to what I wanted to do, but I told Addison I would have to think about it. The following week an email announced an event for HLC's staff. Staff members who wanted to go to the Blue Jackets game would receive a free ticket and would only have to pay for guests. Addison, her boyfriend, Sydney, Caitlin, Kelly, Sam, Olivia, her boyfriend, and I decided to meet at a bar before the game, bus down to the game, and then go bar-hopping after.

While the events of that night were really fun, something more important happened that night. I sat between Addison and Olivia during the game. At some point during the game, Olivia and her boyfriend decided to get some snacks. So with a two-seat gap between me and the others and the only other person who could hear me being Addison's boyfriend, I made my move.

"Hey Addison…"

"Hey Mitch, what's up?"

"So I definitely want to take you up on your offer, but I'm hoping to move out of my parents' house soon and right now I need both Kroger and Ace to make that happen."

We talked for a little bit longer, and I remembered what I had heard about becoming a teacher's aide. As soon as I mentioned that position, I saw the "light bulb" go off in Addison's head. "You should talk to Kathy about that." Addison said with a knowing smile.

Kathy is one of the directors at HLC (basically a principal). She has been with the school since I was a student and was a big part of why Addison hired me in the first place. I decided to take Addison's advice, and I planned to talk to Kathy after the upcoming spring break. But, unfortunately, none of us knew what that spring break 2020 would truly bring.

To be Continued...

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 14: The Time Has Come

 The Time Has Come

Marshall and I flew back from Colorado on a different day than Aspen. Because she wasn't coming back for a couple of days, and my family was in Tennessee, I decided to stay in Cincinnati with Marshall until my family drove through. When we got back to Marshall's house, we blew up my air mattress and got ready for bed. As I got into bed, I got a goodnight text...

On the night of May 20th, I pulled up to my date's apartment. "Well Ishana," I said, letting go of her hand, "I had a really good time… would you like to do it again?"

"Yeah!" Ishana replied enthusiastically, "I'll text you tomorrow and we'll make plans for next week!"

It turned out that we both had the next Tuesday off, so we decided to go to a movie together. We went to a movie theater called Marcus Crosswoods Cinema, which has reclining seats. The seats are in pairs of two with an armrest in the middle to split them up. There were only two older women in the theater with us. Because we had already broken this barrier on our first date, Ishana and I enter the theater holding hands. Ishana's hand was pressed up against the armrest, and so after 15 minutes, her hand fell asleep. She let go and told me what happened. Not wanting her to let go again, I pushed to the armrest, so we were sitting in one giant seat. I promise I didn't plan this, but we were cuddling within a minute after I removed the armrest!

Now Ishana and I learned pretty quickly that these reclining seats are only just comfortable enough for laying down in; they are not ideal for cuddling. So throughout the movie, she and I were moving around trying to find a comfortable position but eventually stopped cuddling because it was too complicated.

We continued watching the movie, and at the end of the scene, the screen cut to black. I thought it was part of the movie until the audio continued, and the video still didn't come back. The time has come, I thought to myself, knowing if I didn't go for it, I would regret it. Now I didn't want to start kissing her immediately after is the movie crapped out. So I spent five minutes slowly inching closer and closer to her.

I kissed Ishana on the cheek, and she looked at me. "Is that okay?" I asked *to the Kay Jewelers jingle* Every kiss begins with consent ding!

"Yes!" she said smiling, and we started kissing.

During the five minutes that I have been slowly inching closer to Ishana, one of the two older women decided to tell a theater employee that the movie had stopped. When she came back into the theater, she thought she would do a good deed and let Ishana and I know that the movie would be fixed.

"Stop, Stop!" Ishana said, pulling away.

I was confused at first because I thought I did something wrong. Before I had a chance to ask her what was going on, I heard a soft voice behind me, "Excuse me!"

As I laid on the air mattress at Marshall's house, I read the goodnight text from my now girlfriend, Ishana. I thought about how awkward that situation was due to the older lady. But, I smiled because despite how uncomfortable that made both of us, Ishana and I are still dating at the end of the day, and I couldn't be happier!

Have A Greattastic Day And Be Safe!

J. Mitchie Ulibarri

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 13: The Broken Curse

 The Broken Curse

Aspen, Marshall, and I got off our plane, and we were picked up by August and Kid, who had been in Colorado for a couple of days. We drove the hour to Arden's house in Fort Collins, and as soon as we entered the house, it began.

"Mitchie!" Arden said, hugging me after she had said hi to Marshall and Aspen. Next, she introduced us to her two roommates, Taylor and Shantel, and shortly after, some of their friends started arriving for the tropical-themed 4th of July party.

"Oh my gosh!" I said excitedly, "I forgot about my Uncle Sam hat!"

"You brought that thing?" Aspen asked, annoyed.

 "Did you think I was gonna let that tradition die?" I replied. There was a blow-up pool in the backyard, and the girls wanted to go swimming. Unfortunately, the water was cold, so Shantel had the brilliant idea of boiling water and pouring it into the pool.

"There's no way that is going to work." Marshall said, trying to explain the science. Chantel didn't care, and August and I spent the next 30 minutes boiling water, pouring it into the pool, and not making much of a difference.

After our failed attempts at getting the pool warmer, we went back inside, and Arden introduced us to one of her friends she had met when she lived in Loveland, named Andrea. I was having a normal conversation with Aundrea when suddenly, for absolutely no reason, the girls picked me up by my arms and legs and just started throwing me up in the air like I was the MVP at a sports game.

It felt bizarre for the girls not to be mad at me during a 4th of July event because that day seems to be cursed for our group. Almost every year since 2015, there has been some form of drama that develops on the 4th of July in our group. So I'm writing this installment because even though nothing really happened, I'm delighted that I finally got to enjoy the 4th of July stress-free with my friends again!

Have A Greattastic Day And Be Safe

J. Mitchie Ulibarri!

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 12: Did he just say “Psych”?

 Did He Just Say “Psych”?

I got on the plane in Atlanta on my way back from Greg and Temi's wedding. I knew that on the following Saturday (7/3/2021), I would be getting on another plane at the Cincinnati airport on the way to Colorado. So the day finally arrived, and Aspen picked me up from my house. We drove the hour and 40 minutes to Marshall's house, and then we headed right to the airport.

Now I checked a bag, and Marshall thought it was a carry-on, so we got to the airport a little later than we probably should have. The line to check the bag was incredibly long. The only reason we actually made our flight was that almost everyone in the line was on the flight to Denver. When the people behind the counter figured that out, they opened up more lines. Still, we were some of the last people on the plane.

Marshall and Aspen sat together, and I sat between two ladies, one set of seats in front of them and in the other aisle. The plane took off on time, and we didn't run into any issues until we were approaching Denver. "Attention ladies and gentlemen," the Captain said over the intercom, "There is some weather over Denver so we are going to have to circle around a couple of times because for those of you who aren't familiar with aerodynamics we can't just stop the plane!"

I thought that was kind of rude because I would assume it's common knowledge that you can't stop a plane in mid-air… But, I don't know, maybe that's with me. So, we spent the next 20 minutes circling around the skies of Colorado until, eventually, he told us that we were finally going to land.

The lady who sat in the window seat opened her window shade which I really appreciated because I love watching the plane land. I watched as we slowly got closer to the ground, and I heard the wheels come out. When we were right above the runway, I was so excited to finally be back in Colorado. The wheels touch the ground, but suddenly without warning, the plane pulled up, and we started flying again!

"What?" Every passenger said in unison.

"Psych!" The Captain said over the intercom a few seconds later.

A few people throughout the plane laughed at that, including me. "I'm sorry," the lady in the window seat said, "Did he just say 'psych'?"

At that point, I realized how mad most of the plane was about our current predicament. So we circled for yet another 20 minutes. When we landed, the pilot finally explained that he had overshot the runway, so there wasn't enough room for him to slow down. I get why everyone was mad, but at least we didn't crash into the side of the airport!

To Be Continued...

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 11: Greg’s Wedding Part 3: Congratulations To The Bride And Groom!

Greg’s Wedding Part 3: Congratulations To The Bride And Groom!

"You may kiss the bride!" the pastor said at the end of the Western wedding. Everyone cheered! We bowed our heads for a quick blessing, and as I looked down, I saw Greg's wedding ring on his finger. Oh my gosh, they're married, I thought to myself in utter disbelief.

We processed out of the wedding in a botanical garden and got ready for the reception. The wedding party entered the reception, and Greg and Temi had their first dance. Then there were the mother-son and father-daughter dances, followed by everyone giving their speeches. When the speeches were finished everybody started dancing.

The plan was that Greg and Temi would make their exit and change into regular clothes at the end of the reception while I ran to the car and waited to pick them up to take them to a hotel. About 20 minutes before the reception ended, Greg came up to me. "Hey," he said, "I left my regular clothes in the rental car. Can you go and get them?"

"Of course!" I said with enthusiasm.

It was about 11:00, so the garden was dark, and I realized that I had no idea where the parking garage was. Lucky for me, I saw Greg's sister Melody and asked her if she knew where it was. Melody led me through a couple of buildings, and before we left the last one, she left the door open so that we wouldn't get locked out.

We got to the car, and after we got his clothes, we started to run back to the reception. But, unfortunately, the door that Melody had propped open had been closed. We both started to panic until we saw a security guard.

"I don't have a key to that door," he said. "Try going to the front desk."

Luckily as we were starting to head that way, we found a woman who had a key to a side gate. So we got back to the reception just in time to give Greg his clothes. Within a couple of minutes, Greg and Temi made their exit, and I picked them up and drove them to the hotel.

Congratulations Greg and Temi! Wishing you a Greattastic life and a very happy marriage!

J. Mitchie Ulibarri

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 10: Greg’s Wedding Part 2: Nigerian Ceremony

 Greg’s Wedding Part 2: Nigerian Ceremony

Temi, Greg's bride, is from Nigeria. As I mentioned in a previous installment, "Groomsman," I have known that they would get married long before the actual engagement announcement. What I didn't realize initially was that there were going to be two weddings. The first was a Nigerian ceremony on Saturday (6/26/21), and the second was a Western ceremony on Sunday (6/27/21).

Greg, the other groomsmen, and I arrived at the Nigerian wedding venue at about three, dressed in our traditional attire. We were introduced to the woman leading the ceremony (whose title name I cannot remember), and she told us not to be stressed. The groom's party took a sigh of relief as a group, and we were taken into a back room to wait.

The ceremony started without us because everybody (Greg and Temi's families then the groom’s and bride’s parties) entered individually. When it was our turn to enter, the leader told us to dance to the music played. I was trying hard not to stim (flap my hands/squeal in excitement), so to cope, I just had a giant goofy smile on my face. After we danced in, we were led through the ceremony. About halfway through, the leader asked, "By raise of hands is anyone married?" None of the groom's men were, so none of us raised our hands. Because I was still smiling, though, the leader saw me and asked me specifically, "Are you married?"

I knew she wouldn't take me seriously with the way I had been smiling, so I said, "No!" very firmly. It wasn't until everyone started laughing that I realize that it sounded like I was saying, "No, I'm not married and I don't want to be! I don't know what Greg is thinking he's crazy!"

When we finished our part of the ceremony, the groomsmen sat down, and Temi and the Bridesmaids entered. The Bridesmaids did their part of the ceremony, and then they sat down. When it was just Temi standing alone, she was directed to "choose" a gift that Greg's family had donated. The gift she chose was a bible, and in the package with it was a ring. Long story short, Greg had to "re-propose" to Temi in front of everyone! We watched him get down on one knee and profess his love to her. As he spoke the words, we all knew this was the most genuine thing he had ever said because of how he looked at her, and it was beautiful.

To Be Continued...

Season 4 Step 1 Blog 9: Greg’s Wedding Part 1: A Story About The Bachelor

 Greg’s Wedding Part 1: A Story About The Bachelor

I got off the plane in Atlanta, Georgia, got my bag from baggage claim, then met up with one of Greg's two best men, Timmy.

"So…" Timmy said, as we were walking into the rental car pick-up, "I'm gonna need you to step up and be the second person registered to drive the rental car. Are you ok with that?"

"Ummm, yeah, I can do that!" I said, not sure if I actually could.

After we signed all the paperwork, we got into the rental car, picked up a couple more groomsmen, and went to "the bachelor pad." There were six other friends of Greg's who were in the wedding party, and a few others joined us throughout the night.

We went to two different places for the bachelor party. The first stop was TopGolf where we played for about two hours. After that, we went to this incredibly expensive restaurant, and we all ate to our heart's content. Finally, we got back to the bachelor pad sometime after midnight. As we were busy the next day, Greg suggested that we go to bed.

"Well, actually," Timmy said, "I have asked everyone to prepare a little story about you and your character."

Everyone got situated, and we went around the room telling stories. Mine went a little something like this: When Greg and I were growing up we would have lightsaber fights. We would actually script out fight choreography because we were nerds. One summer evening, after a long day of dueling, Greg and I were sitting in his front yard talking. Suddenly Greg's front door opened, and his dad stood on the front step holding a lightsaber.

"I've got a bad feeling about this." I said.

Greg smiled at the reference, and we swung our lightsabers open. Greg and I charged his father, and the battle began. The fight was very intense because Greg's dad was fighting strategically, so we had to fight even harder just to stay in the game. Eventually, Greg and I got separated, and only Greg's dad and I were fighting. His dad took a swing, and my grip on the lightsaber was not tight enough at that moment, and it flew out of my hands. Before he realized that I was now defenseless, Greg's dad took another swing and hit me right across the face. I hit the ground in incredible pain. I saw Greg's face contort in rage as he let out a scream and threw his lightsaber at his dad, and hit him right between the legs!

I told that story because that's who Greg has always been to me. He has always defended and been there for me. He was with me when my "sisters" and I were fighting, he was there when I was coping with S.M.'s death, and he was there whenever I was having a bad day. Greg has been so loyal to me even when I didn't necessarily deserve that friendship from him, and I am so thankful for that.

To Be Continued...