Season 8 Goals And Dreams Blog 11: Keep Me In Your Heart

 Keep Me In Your Heart

In loving memory of Shana Marie (Savage) Tackett

June 22, 1979-May 16, 2025

On Monday, June 2, 2025, Paige and I got to my parents' house on Meadow Park Drive at about 3:45. We got out of the car and walked to the funeral home at the top of the street. My mom’s sister, Shana, passed away on May 16th, about a week after Paige and I got engaged. We entered for the visiting hours and spent that time talking to family and friends, which included my dad’s side of the family from Florida.

The service started at 6. After everyone had talked about their favorite memories about Shana (I was the last one), Ryan, Luke, Josh, and I stood up and prepared to play a cover of a song called Keep Me In Your Heart by Warren Zevon. As my brothers started playing the intro (Ryan and Luke on guitar and Josh on harmonica), I thought back on Shana's impact on my life.

Mom was about 6 months pregnant with me when Shana graduated from high school, and I am the oldest grandchild on Mom’s side. As the first baby, I know I had a very special place in Shana’s heart. On my end, Shana was just a college kid; she wasn’t a full adult like Mom and Dad or Aunt Melissa or Uncle Andy were. On some level, I was able to watch Shana grow up, even if I was completely aware of it. This dynamic led me to see her more as a friend than as my aunt.

From the time I was 2, Shana would take me to the mall. Whenever we were together, she was very interested in what was going on with my life, and that continued as I grew up. I spent many nights sleeping at Shana’s house, telling her about the struggles I had making friends as an autistic child. It was during one of these sleepovers that I held the first baby I ever would: Shana and Uncle Scott’s daughter, Lexi. While Shana and I didn’t see each other as much after Lexi was born, it was evident that Shana was born to be a mom.

On Saturday, September 30, 2023, Aunt Cyndi and Jeremy got married. While I wrote an installment about it (The Wedding Of Cyndi And Jeremy), their relationship was obviously the point of that installment. On that date, Paige and I were just days away from our 6-month anniversary. Paige and Shana met for the first time at the wedding. The whole reception, Shana was jokingly saying, “So you guys are going to get married next, right?” At the time, Paige and I had already discussed the possibility of getting married, but we didn’t tell Shana then. Despite how sad I am about her death, I’m glad that the last thing she knew about me was that Paige and I got engaged!

Now, even though my books are available on Amazon, I make more money if I sell them myself. As a result, I don’t pay too much attention to the book reviews. When you publish a sequel, it takes about 24 hours for it to be connected to the rest of the series. The day after I published The Greattastic Adventures 2: Fractured, I was obsessively looking on Amazon to make sure everything had worked properly. As I was scrolling through, I noticed a review on my first book, The Greattastic Adventures: Miracle Child. It read as follows:

Shana Tackett-  Reviewed in the United States on March 13, 2023

MUST READ!! LOVE this book!! His story is so endearing, and he has this awesome positive outlook on life. I think he is so inspiring to everyone, not just to those living with Autism, but all people all over! Definitely purchasing his next one!

Now, is that review anything special? No. But me finding it now as opposed to back in 2023 makes me feel like it’s Shana saying, “I’m okay.”

As the boys and I sang the song, I looked out at Shana‘s friends and family. I imagined Shana standing in the back of the room and smiling as we finished singing, because I think she would have really loved it.

I love and miss you, Shana.

Your nephew- John Mitchell Ulibarri