Stuck On The Moon, Part 1
This 2-parter is dedicated to a classmate’s mom (Sheila Tuttle), who passed away during the events of the end-credit scene in part 2. While I didn’t know her that well anymore, she had a pretty big impact on my early life, and she will be dearly missed.
In the installment Friends Of Noah, I introduced you to another blind athlete named Emilia, and her fiancé Jake, from Pittsburgh. Sometime between Paige and me getting back from the honeymoon and my birthday, Noah invited me to Emilia and Jake's wedding as his plus one. Paige wanted to come with us on the road trip because she has some family in Pittsburgh (dad’s side), so she would hang out with them during the wedding. Unfortunately (or fortunately, in the long run), Paige had a family reunion (mom’s side) that same weekend, so she chose to go to that instead… This was a dry wedding. Noah added a six-pack of beer to his Kroger order for the trip so we could have a couple of drinks before the ceremony (bride-sanctioned, of course). Noah and I aren't very timely people, and because it was such a long drive, we planned for me to arrive at his house (nicknamed Roger) at 10:00 a.m., go to Kroger immediately after, and then hit the road (the wedding started at 3:30).
On Saturday September 5th 2026, I dropped Paige off at her parents’ house at 7:15, I returned home by 7:30, posted Bad Days 2, showered, arrived at my parents’ house to get my suit coat at 9:45, arrived at Noah's right at 10:00, went to Kroger to pick up the order at 10:15, went to the bathroom, and headed out at 10:30. We made a pit stop in Cambridge Ohio, and our ETA was then at 2:00 pm. From there, everything was pretty uneventful until we got to Steubenville, Ohio. I took a couple of wrong turns before crossing into West Virginia, which pushed our ETA to about 2:15; still not bad. Once we were finally in Pennsylvania, we discussed stopping for food and changing into our suits. The plan was: get food, keep driving while we eat, and then change into our suits at a gas station. After talking about it we decided to stop at Chick-fil-A. I added that to my route, and it said that it only added 5 minutes. It wasn't until we were almost upon it that I realized, for some reason, Apple Maps had decided to take us to the Chick-fil-A at the Pittsburgh Airport.
I pulled over and did a little more searching, and we eventually decided the best place to go would be a Sheetz Gas station, so we could change and get food there. Also, it was 10 minutes from their venue, so if I filled up there, we would basically go home on a full tank. I parked the car, we got our suits, and walked to the bathroom, taking up both stalls. I finished before Noah, and a guy walked in and took my stall. As if on cue, Queen’s You’re My Best Friend started playing, and Noah and I began singing it at each other. It wasn't until later, when I thought back on it, that I realized how weird it probably was for the guy in the stall. My wedding shoes were still in the car, and we put our regular clothes into Noah's backpack. We went to order food, and I told Noah to wait there while I got in my car, got my shoes on, and got gas. I put my key in the ignition, and it would not turn over. Even though it was still in park, it acted like it was in neutral, and it rolled over a curb. The bumper on my car is really crappy, and I've had issues with it since that kid ran the red and hit me in Bad Days 1, so when the car ran over the curb, the bumper started to pop off. I told Noah, We managed to push my car back over the curb and pop the hood. By this point it was 3:10, and Noah let Emilia know what was going on, while I FaceTimed Dad. Dad asked me if someone could hold my phone while I tried to turn it on so he could see what was going on with the engine. I found two ladies in the parking lot and asked for their help. Dad thought that my battery was corroded, and he asked how we were doing on time. I explained that the ceremony started in 10 minutes, and the ladies offered to drive Noah and me there.
The ladies were 2 sisters named Tricia and Tracy. As we ate and finished getting ready, we told them what was going on, and they commented that this was a very Wedding Crashers situation. On the drive, Tricia said, “If anyone asks you where the car is, tell them you are at the Sheetz in Moon Township.”
“Wait,” I said, “So you're telling me that we got stuck on the moon?”
Everybody laughed, and we continued our drive to the venue. The venue was called The Fez, and Noah and I walked in at 3:37. “So much for being on time,” Noah laughed. We walked in, and the whiteboard read “The Wedding of Whitney and Jeff.” I was clearly confused, and one of the event staff asked us what wedding we were going to. As soon as we said "Emilia and Jake," they directed us down a hallway and told us that it was the first door on the left.
Directly behind that door was a curtain with images of trees on it. I had opened the door, and Noah had let go of my elbow to walk through. Just as Noah's cane poked through the curtain, I heard the pastor speaking to the congregation, directly behind it. Wedding Crashers indeed, I thought.
To Be Continued…
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